What right does a dumbass have to consider wisdom? Better to be a smartass than a dumbass, I have been told, but is it redeemable to be both? Can one be both at once and exist on this plane? If you are part smartass and part dumbass, is there an official word for that? Smarbass? Duartass?

So dumb it’s brilliant, or just dumb? Or, perhaps, they are states on a sliding scale within all of us that is partly determined by the length and quality of sleep. Perhaps one refers to a duartass when they say, “Bless your heart” or talk about what screws and lightbulbs are loose in one’s head.